Why wasn't I in the film?

So what's going on, hey? Mum and dad tell me they made a film today with a bunch of high school kids.

What about me? It isn't fair...I've had enough now I want my share...

Now I know that I didn't want to get out of bed this morning because it was really chilly when they left....but that's no reason to leave me out of the film. I'm the only star in this family. Really! They just don't give me the opportunity to prove it...so I'm left here blogging.

But...(snigger, smirk)...mum tells me dad kept stuffing up all his lines in the film. They had to do take after take for him to get it right. Guess that will make one hell of a bloopers tape!
Moi...I'm a professional. I would've got it right on the first take. But of course, if I didn't like the script, I wouldn't do it. Unless they persuaded me with some goodies.

Oh, well, looks like I'll have to send in an audition tape to Big Brother after all.

Looks like I'm not going to be starring in Cool Bananas anytime soon....